Me: Printer, please print this thing right now
Printer: I sit here doing nothing for days, but as I see you are in a hurry, let me start this tedious, 5-minute-long self-calibration procedure that will make my renderings crispy and fabulous.
Me: Oh no I need it now
Printer: clickety-click whirr-whirr clonky-clonky hear the music in me
Me: I hate you, Printer
Printer: Ha ha ha I smell your fear you bald monkey